Random Burst of Thought

If I close my eyes now,  and think about it, I feel the sensation bubbling against my eyelids.

there's a build up of feeling, slowly rising, and it's completely dreadful. It's an overwhelming taste of sadness, and longing.

I want you there.

 And I know you want to be there. but you can't.

I know this is for the better, but it does nothing to quell the overwhelming sadness inside of me. I'm sorry.

So if I tear up tomorrow, or cry tonight, it's not cause I'm mad or angry. it's just cause I miss you. and I wanna be with you. I want you to be with me. and I love you, and I know you love me.

just..

it's just cause I'm still learning how to be patient.